21 October 2008
Love is in the air!
Well I started with this quote because I feel that the cupid is working its magic on my friends. Yup it seems like many are in love. It’s so weird. One of my guy friends is in love with my best friend, another best friend of mine is in love with another guy friend of mine and then there were a few other rumoured couples in the class.
Love is such a complicated thing ya…I mean, first there are so many definitions for the word “love”…then there is the question of what type of love and how does “love” feels like. Then some people would confuse you further by asking you to differentiate love and like. What the Hell?!! I for one don’t know anything about love. Yes, I love my parents. That was easy to say, but, how to prove it? Does love need proof anyway? Is familial love is easier to understand? I guess. If you ask me, I guess it’s like you just want to see that person happy and you try to be there for that family member that you love when they need you. Or, sometimes, just because you lie to them because don’t want them to feel sad. I admire most the love and sacrifice a parent give to their child. I’m 21 now and if I were “lucky” enough to be a mum now, I don’t think I can even do half the things my mum or dad had done for me. Just simple examples would be how mum would eat less so that we can have an extra share of our favourite dish, or maybe make some delicious juices or beverage for us when we are stressed out with exams, plus then she has to take care of the whole household, cook and clean the house (The things that I dread doing) My dad has to work everyday, regardless of his mood. He has faces so many challenges at work, without complain. Sometimes, it’s like he has to keep all his problems to himself just because he doesn’t want us to worry. SO I’d really want to take this chance to say a HUGE HUGE Thank you to my parents for being such great parents.
I then ask myself…is love as in boy-girl relationship’s love the same? If it is then, how can people differentiate their love for their guy & gal friends from their love for their special guy/galfriends? WAH!!!!!!! Very de complicated!! Maybe I feel confused because what I write is coming from a brain of an immature 21-year-old who knows nuts about love and relationships. I mean, seriously, I’ve never been in a relationship before but I’m very very idealistic about love hehehe. I’d always like to think that I’d find the guy that has all the qualities I want. I don’t expect the guy to be perfect in other’s eyes, but just in my eyes. I guess that you can always imagine how that someone would be like, but when love strikes you, I guess that person might not be what you have in mind. As I grow up and look around me, I hate to admit that the chances of me getting my dream guy are near zero. I mean, I noticed that many people usually ends up with someone who is a complete opposite of what they initially want in a partner. Let’s see, I want a guy who is buff and hunky and witty, and has a lot of similarities with me. So I guess I’m getting something opposite – skinny, boring and not compatible with me. ARGH…
But whatever it is, love is still a complicated feeling, which I have yet to understand. I mean, I’ve had crushes, but then again, are crushes = love? And even if you fall in love, you can fall out of love. Can love be forever? In today’s era, getting married is just like a game. People get married and sometime later, they file for a divorce. Marriage is not permanent and could be just a false promise. It’s not that I don’t want to get married or that I don’t believe in marriages, but they is definitely a slight concern because, sad to say, I don’t trust guys la (no offense, but it is true)
Whatever it is, I’m really happy for my bestie, YY; I hope she had found the right guy in Eugene. Maybe they still need time to develop their relationship becuz they just started the dating game, but I guess if everything goes on well, I’ll be wearing my bridesmaid dress soon hahaha…..YY remember! I’m ur bridesmaid! Well, when your best friend starts dating, you have to make a lot of adjustments too you know. Like me, I have to do a lot of things differently. Last time, I was usually glued to YY wherever I go – movies, shopping, sight-seeing or late night chattings. Now, even though YY say that I can still stick to her, but a considerate friend should know how to leave some time for her and her new bf right? So I find myself left alone and had to join another group of friends. I mean, it’s okay, it’s just that sometimes it’s kinda weird… just not having the best friend who practically knows everything about u around. Thank God Lydia (another best friend of mine) is still around, but Lydia has her own set of love issue, waiting to be solved. Well…yeah, like I said, very complicated. Let’s stop there. Haha
Well talking about college, it’s like our fifth semester and college life is actually coming to an end. These few days had got me thinking about all the stuff that I’ve been through so far in college. This semester is so boring. We only have 3 days of classes and I don’t really get to hang out with many of my college friends.
I so miss the times we did our assignments – shooting and, especially editing together. See, I’ve developed a brother-sisterly affection for all my group mates. This is because they were the ones who had gone through the hard times with me, under very very stressful conditions. I guess if you can actually work with or stand someone under those pinning situations, then you know that person is one that you can work with. I mean, when we were actually working on the assignments, our stress level is very high and many times, we get on one another’s nerves. But when everything is over and you recall back, you actually missed those times. During our shooting, we hate that we have to go back late practically every night – sometimes 2 a.m. but now, I sit in my hostel room, with nothing to do and I wish I could go back to those days where we had to work till 2 a.m. The 5 days of editing in See Yeong’s house will be the highlight of my life for quite some time. The 5 days there was tortorous as we had limited resources for editing and the amount of pressure was pressing against each of us. There was no time to waste and my best friend had shed quite a couple drops of tears. But I guess those are the times that I reminisce and would actually go through again. To be fair, I actually had the least to do during the editing stage haha. I just helped out very little, cuz I have to leave it to the pros. I was there just to mess things up a little haha. But those five days created a stronger bond between us. I got to know YY even more, you know, what are her demands when she works (she’s quite professional and she works darn hard to achieve what she wants) but she can be quite fierce and bad-tempered under stress haha…but she will only scold the guys lar…KF is the most laidback and calm person I’ve ever met. He was the one who was there to solve problems when everyone is in confusion. Once YY thought she lost one whole part of the drama, and she started to cry (I totally understand why – we are running out of time) KF was the one who searched the files one by one and managed to recover the file. Honestly, haha, KF was the one, who got on our nerves the most during shooting, but I can’t believe I’m saying this but he is the best when it comes to editing. One thing I’ve learnt about this group member of mine is that, even when he says he doesn’t know something, it means he knows. He knows stuff but he doesn’t say it. Plus his lame jokes sometimes can get u through stuff. But sometimes you just wanna slap him on the head. As for Eugene, hmmm….haha…he was in love with YY during our editing, so it all makes sense now that at that time when we were editing, he tried hard to impress YY. Eugene is very patient and during the shooting, he was the best because he listens to everyone’s opinions. But of course, during editing, he wasn’t shining because he doesn’t know the editing softwares well. He has been trying hard (sometimes TOO HARD) to learn and improve though and one thing about Eugene is that he will change if he wants to. Eugene now has to learn how to be more confident because whoever dates YY has to be very confident because she’s a guy’s girl. She has many guy friends and Eugene has to now learn how to overcome his insecurities. But I guess Eugene can do it. He’s really working hard for YY, which is good. I hope they can last. Lydia has learnt to stand up for herself and became more confident when working, so I guess it’s a very good thing. Before this, during editing, I was always pairing YY and KF, Eugene and Lydia…hmmm…I guess I got it wrong. I am not born a match-maker indeed. Hahaha. Whatever it is, I treat this few friends of mine (YY, Lydia, KF and Eugene and even See Yong) as sisters and brothers (though they might not treat me the same) Plus, among the bunch, I’m the youngest and I love being the little sister for once, since I’m the eldest in my family.
As for me, I also discovered that I can be darn relaxed and lazy even when the dateline is approaching. I was the one who jumped and played around but I tried to calm the others who were stressed out okay. I had no fear the first 3 days and it was until the 4th and 5th day that I started to panic a little. Anyway all these were some memories that I’ll keep forever in my mind.
That's all for now ya ;)
take carezzzzzzz
(A group pic of the crew of S.H.E Balls!)
From left: Elyssa,Nic,YY,Eugene,Lace, KimFatt, Lydia & ME!!!
