♥ BABYT'S WORLD OF CRAP ♥

Monday, May 08, 2006

Dated 24-3-06

Let me start this blog by saying that the song Shine..by Shannon Noll ROCKS!! I am so in love with it..

Anywayz i'm back in Ipoh.. i mean whenever i blog, that means that i'm at home ...it's alwayz great to be back at home..hmm...i wonder y dad don't want to move the whole family to KL..i mean tat way we can all be together rite?? i dun get it...hmm..but i dun wan to question him either..i mean what's da point..u can never win when u debate with him...he's always the one with da facts that hit u rite in da face.. i dunno... 2 weeks ago was really hard.. dad was like getting a bit on my nerves...he's such a ..i dunno perfect person n it's like u hv to be tat good when u r with him...i know his advice r valuable, useful n bla..bla ..but then there's just times when u really dun agree with him even though u know he's right.. i mean..yes i'm really a kinda spoiled lil kid..and i really dun really do housechores and all.. but then i do do housework when i'm asked to right?...wat happened tat day was...he asked me to help clean up the house so fine..at 9am i woke up (very rare) n great i had to mop d floors everything...NO PROB.. but then he asked me how do i want to mop it..from which part to which part...i'm like...WHAT?? i simply gave him an answer..wat eva tat's on my mind at that time cuz i dun freakin care..i just wan to get d job done and go back to ..erm sleep haha...anywayz..then he's like...y do u wan to mop it from here to ther...bla bla..n i'm like... simply gave him another answer...and i'm screwed cuz i din argue my point as in y i wanted to do it the way i said i do (confusing??..reread a couple of time if u have the time).. i mean, to me it's like JUST MOVE ON WITH DA MOPPING YO! Y ask so many questions ... and then after everything later in d afternoon we had a talk la..(my dad always gives lectures after an incident...) so we tried to discussed wat happened in da morning...dad wanna know y i was so pissed and he wanted to share wit me y he's so pissed..actually i know y he's mad..i did a few things on purpose to piss him haha..BAD BAD...(like purposely leave my bag on d bed when it sud be place back on d floor) but i was overwhelmed with anger at tat moment...anywayz he was mad becuz he thinks that i dun hv initiative (true) and that i hv no planning when i work (True only with some type of work..like housechores) and that i have to be asked to work only then i will work..he said that i'm like a wood..hmmm..well,..to me it's like true i guess parts of it...but not completely...i mean...i do hv planning when doing my assignments n some other stuff..n i do help with housechores like washing the dishes (my niche) and i do hang clothes and all..he said that i'm spoiled by my mum n i said i love being spoiled...i mean..i dun think my mum spoils me too much.. i love my mum tat way.. i mean i know being spoil is not really too bad but ..if u read ANdrew Matthews 'Follow Your Heart', there's a chapter called SPOIL YOURSELF A LITTLE...i mean, tat's y me n my siblings are more attached to my mum, she spoils us a little .... she will do many things to please us..n that's y we want to please her..we would try our best sometimes to make her happy...dad is very...i dunno...i love him too..but in terms of personalities ..we're poles apart(Learned from translation class haha)...dad, i think have got to spoil himself a lil..but the thing is..he enjoys doing really serious stuffs..so d way he spoil himself is also kinda boring la..for example he splurge on books n read all day or work...for me n my mum n my sis n my bro, we would prefer to splurge more on unnecessary stuff...like a vacation, movies...latest stuff...dad's just planning for our future so he doesn't really spend...i mean, he's really responsible and that's cool! and dad's d one that u sud go for advice...i dun agree with his 'PERFECTIONIST TRAIT' but i love some of his advice...
mum n dad is just different..i love them for different reasons..dad is better n more understanding in some ways n mum in some other ways..n tat's y i love them both so much..they're different...but after that morning...i feel a lil awkward when i'm with dad..it's like i have to impress him or something...it's stressful..i hv to becareful with everything i do..sigh..too stressful...but with my mum..i can just be myself...

One thing is over and another crop up..assignments, assignments all bugging me..can't even hv a weekend off...i mean i still hv to do researches when i'm back at home when i actually planned to relax (C i do plan..haha) Group members issues as usual...dun think some of them actually like me as the leader..maybe i'm too pushy or wateva..but i would really appreciate it if they tell me...i mean some of the things they say hv hidden meanings...and i think if they tell me that they dun want me as the leader i won't hv any prob.. i mean i know i'm pretty useless..anywayz i can't make everyone like me right? i know i'm not always right la...i admit that i'm not good at certain things but i guess i'll learn...hopefully i'll learn haha.. but i think my group members are pretty good compared to others..sigh sigh sigh...AM I REALLY TAT BAD??!! Feel like hell....Lately i just hate myself...i mean..i think i'm beginning to act like a bitch..i'm more selfish...y oh y...no idea...i'm not tat nice anymore n i hate it....i dunno..i'm also darn sensitive, in a not so good way....i just dun like myself at all anymore...

anywayz...let's move on to a more airy topic such as AMERICAN IDOL!!! KATHARINE MCPHEE ROCKS!!! SHe's so HOT and SHE CAN REALLY REALLY SING!! Ace is ACE..SO DARN CUTE n Boyband kinda style..i know many thinks he's lame but I LURVE!! Chris still ROCKS as USUAL!! He sud be like making an album or sumthing..he doesnt need this competition...Paris is as ANNOYING AS USUAL...and DAMN..she's good...so there's no way she'll be out any sooner so ..ARGH!!! The others all i like so i'm very undecided on who sud leave but if possible i want d PARIS OUT A.S.A.P even though she can sing...OH AND SEACREST is STILL AS HOT!! What would be so cool is that if ACE DATES KATHARINE!! They're perfect for each other...they could do a duet or sumthin as well...it's gonna be GREAT!!

Now my fave shows are What i like about you..(u really sud check out d hottie --> DAN CORTESE who will be starring in the next season of WHAT I LIKE ABOUT YOU!!.. HE is REally DA HOT MAn!! And in d show he's Valle's hmmm....accidental husband.. or sud i put it this way...they got married accidentally...and fell in love when waiting for their marriage annulment....bla ..bla..just check him out..I LURVE VALLE n they LOOK GREAT TOGETHER!!!!!!! THough only in d show ...), Save the LAst Dance..a lame Korean LOVE STORY but i just love the lead actress, Eugene (she really looks a bit like Katharine, both look really sweet) although d show's lame but sometimes it's just fun to sink yourself into some sort of ridiculous love drama just to get your mind of reality, which really sucks...i mean..i really dun believe that there are such complicated LOVE STORIES in life...i find it really stupid...hmmm...if u happen to experience all this kinda love complications maybe u cud like share them with me... but i really hope tat all these complicated lovey dovey probs dun eva occur in my life..i just want a simple and happy relationship, someone to share my sorrows n happiness..ups n downs..
...THAT'S THAT...ok ok drifting away like my lecturer Miss TANG..and hmm American Idol...i'm always stuck in front of the TV..and it's really scary to some ppl...i'm such a couch potato...

Anywayz maybe i sud end here..............i crap too much...i can continue actually if i want but hehe...let's just keep my thoughts for another day....
~well take carez ppl~

HOPE TO SHINE SOMEDAY!!
~TAMMY OUT~

With Lots of Love & Hugs & Kisses & Chris Richardson's scent from BabyT ;